Alan Kercinik has been a Chicagoan his whole life and a dad since 2009. He finds it easy to relate to his two boys, since he still likes most things from his childhood. All opinions here are his own, to the relief of his wife, employer, family and majority of his friends.
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Jack is starting to really like things. Not the way adults like things. By clicking on a button so that our likes populate our stream.
His likes are ferocious. The wife described it pretty well in a status update last week.
Jack’s reaction to the train exhibit at the Botanic Gardens today was like an 11 year-old girl at a Justin Bieber concert. There were screams AND tears of excitement. Seriously, I thought he was going to hop the fence and take a bath in them.
The “taking a bath in them” is because he picked up these small toy trains and started … rubbing them … on himself, one of those things that sounds dirty but isn’t, at least not yet. He was so happy and loved those trains so much that he wanted to injest them. My son, the Aztec warrior.
I could write any number of posts about how I hate the things I miss during the week. I’ll just leave it at I wanted to do something train-related with him, too. So on Saturday, we took him to Old Orchard mall. They not only have a Barnes and Noble, which sports an elaborate Thomas and Friends set-up in the kids’ book section, but this small steam engine that gives kids rides around a plaza near Nordstrom.
It’s a cliche to say that people light up when they’re excited, but the kid was Vegas at night. If we let him, he would have slept at that Barnes and Noble. (We didn’t.) When we finished our ride on the pseudo steam engine, he kind of wandered, groaning and pointing at the train.
Since only about 12 people will read this, I can admit. Seeing him so deleriously happy, so out of his mind excited, choked me up a little. Almost all of what I felt in that moment was caused by fierce love for this boy. But a tiny little sliver was a question, forming in my heart.
When was the last time I was even this close to excited about anything?
–
I was still thinking about it that night. The wife and I went to dinner, then went to a bar to see a friend’s band play. The band is Gaberdine. Keep an ear out. They’re going to be huge. Or at least, they should be.
When my friend took the stage, it struck me what a set of circumstances must have led to that moment. How he followed a passion to this point in his life. How he was brave enough to play the kind of music that was important and personal to him in front of a group of people.
Maybe he doesn’t feel the kind of insane excitement to strap on a guitar that he once did. Maybe as adults, we can’t. Experience and familiarity might make that physically impossible.
Jack won’t love trains like this forever. Or anything else he’s attached to now. But I hope he keeps a some of that joy. And I hope I never do anything to dampen it.
8 comments
Pop says:
August 25, 2010 at 12:21 pm (UTC -5 )
“And I hope I never do anything to dampen it.”
It’s a great responsibility and privilege we parents have. To care for and nurture such innocence and unkempt joy. I may or may not have gotten choked up by this post. Don’t you other 11 people say anything!
Sydney Owen says:
August 25, 2010 at 12:48 pm (UTC -5 )
You absolutely, positively can still have that much joy for something that it makes you cry. If I can, anyway, you definitely can.
Maybe it’s not trains, planes or automobiles, but you said seeing Jack like Vegas over trains ::shhhh:: kinda choked you up. Pretty sure you’re choked up with joy right there, buddy.
And I got teary after my 50th jump. But we can talk more about that later.
Alan Kercinik says:
August 25, 2010 at 5:49 pm (UTC -5 )
I think this is a safe place to admit to those small moments in fatherhood that bring a tear. What a difference a generation or two brings. Thanks for reading.
Alan Kercinik says:
August 25, 2010 at 5:52 pm (UTC -5 )
Too true. To think that little people get to live like this all the time … what a treat.
I think Jack will bring me many moments like that. Sometimes, I just wish that we were given permission as adults, or were capable, of living like that more broadly.
Dad U says:
August 25, 2010 at 6:56 pm (UTC -5 )
I’ve often wondered about the kid/train relationship. Here’s my take:
http://dad-u.blogspot.com/2010/08/dad50-26-to-33-wooden-train-stuff.html
Enjoyed the post
Dad U
Anonymous says:
August 26, 2010 at 8:11 pm (UTC -5 )
Love the post Alan. When we saw Tony Robbins talk at the 140 Twitter Conference, he had us test our ability to celebrate by celebrating like we would if we were really excited. Everyone at first just kind of put their arms up and went “woo.” Adults don’t jump around celebrate the same way kids do. After some prodding, he got us to truly celebrate and it was really fun seeing a room full of professionals jumping up and down with their arms waving crazily like a bunch of lunatics. Ahh to be kids again.
Alicejaytate says:
August 27, 2010 at 10:23 pm (UTC -5 )
Alan,
You should take Jack to the Choo Choo Cafe. In Des Plaines (i think…)
Sit at the counter and have your order delivered by train!
Alan Kercinik says:
August 28, 2010 at 6:04 am (UTC -5 )
Funny you mention. We were going to take him there, but decided after the train rubbing that he’d probably lose his mind and spasm uncontrollably when the food came, so we’re going to wait until he’s a little older and has a light grasp of impulse control.